Highly unusual question for me. It does happen though.
I haven't actually tried to fall asleep for an inordinately long time. Yet, for someone who is usually asleep before the head hits the pillow, 30 minutes of rapid thought rather than slow drifting is out of the ordinary.
I don't know why I find my brain suddenly ignited by thought. Maybe it's the midnight hour. Maybe it's the book I just finished.
Speaking of the book I just finished... "It is not that I feel tremendously low; it's rather that the world around me appears high"... Maybe that is why I cannot sleep. Why is the world around me so high? What do they know that I do not? How do people go on with life untroubled by a sense of absurdity that plagues most of the activities we fill our time with? I am clearly missing the point. In fact, I am sure of it.
Wednesday, 19 May 2010
Die, 2YP, die....
Time: 9:30am
Location: TG, LBS, NW1 4SA
Feeling: strangely out of sorts...
I am at school... Still 2YP. It does cause me some pain. I have NO wish to present to trustees all day tomorrow.
But this kind of stuff is not particularly interesting to write about. In fact I think it causes me some PAIN to write about it... Thus, fast forward and pretend I have whinged and can now move on and feel better ...
Word of the day:
Vellicate: to twitch or cause to twitch; to pluck, nip, irritate, etc
In other news, I feel like I'm turning increasingly misanthropic with time. What is the cure? Hermitage?
Came across a brilliant sentence in a book: "Sexuality is a system of social hierarchy". Such gems are why I love Houellebecq... His position (in this book, anyway) is that there are two systems of hierarchy - side by side: economic and sexual, where money and looks are the respective currencies. Simple. Brilliant.
Location: TG, LBS, NW1 4SA
Feeling: strangely out of sorts...
I am at school... Still 2YP. It does cause me some pain. I have NO wish to present to trustees all day tomorrow.
But this kind of stuff is not particularly interesting to write about. In fact I think it causes me some PAIN to write about it... Thus, fast forward and pretend I have whinged and can now move on and feel better ...
Word of the day:
Vellicate: to twitch or cause to twitch; to pluck, nip, irritate, etc
In other news, I feel like I'm turning increasingly misanthropic with time. What is the cure? Hermitage?
Came across a brilliant sentence in a book: "Sexuality is a system of social hierarchy". Such gems are why I love Houellebecq... His position (in this book, anyway) is that there are two systems of hierarchy - side by side: economic and sexual, where money and looks are the respective currencies. Simple. Brilliant.
Friday, 14 May 2010
Word of the day
...is eristic = pertaining to controversy or disputation; controversial; of argument for the sole purpose of winning, regardless of the reason
my kind of word...
my kind of word...
Date: 14 May, 2010
Location: Home, Kil&Burn, NW2 4SJ
Time: 1pm-ish
Feeling: hard to say actually. Slightly apprehensive. A little bit bored. Thoughtful.
Waiting for Michelle at home. She has finally landed and making her way here. From Essex. Hm.
In other news, had a fight with Vlad. So I don't think we are talking. This is probably not going to end well. Neither of us has a good history in terms of reconciling with people. It started of as a fairly minor thing but kind of blew out of proportion now. That's all I'm going to say about this for now.
In other news, I found a book that I absolutely relate to. It's called 'The Sleepyhead's Bedside Companion'. I can't believe such book exists. I feel vindicated! I am not the only one obsessed with sleep. There are others like me out there. Every page of this book is either articulating what is already in my head or I want imprinted there. I feel less guilt about my (previously thought unhealthy) preoccupation. I seriously think sleep is underrated in today's society which is obsessed with 'making the most' of each minute. Whatever THAT means. Hrumph.
What else. I finally feel comfortable enough to articulate what I have felt for a long time now. I HATE phones. Landlines, mobile phones, smart phones, blackberries. Whatever. I hate them all. I don't like speaking on the phone. I feel like making phone calls is intrusive - what are the odds you are just sitting there and waiting for the phone to ring? Chances are you are somewhere out and phone ringing causes you to madly scramble through your handbag, finally finding the phone as the last ring dies. You then proceed to try to return the call - getting busy signal because the person is either trying you again or leaving a voicemail. You then call them back again, ignoring the voicemail and they proceed to repeat what they just left on your voicemail (which you will incidentally 'discover' again later and proceed to listen to it...). Or you are having a nap and the phone call may slightly disturb your slumber. Cause unpleasant dreams about work... Or you are talking to another person - with the phone ringing you will be forced to stop, answer the phone, talk to the person on the phone while the other person just sits there (chances are they'll whip out their phone and proceed to call other people). Okay - I'm cutting off my own rant here. I feel like some of the anger I feel may be mis-placed here... Also, I feel like I'm never going to get a phone call from my friends again if they read this. Uhhh. I don't ALWAYS hate it - it's just a general feeling I have about phones. They are evil. These days.
Location: Home, Kil&Burn, NW2 4SJ
Time: 1pm-ish
Feeling: hard to say actually. Slightly apprehensive. A little bit bored. Thoughtful.
Waiting for Michelle at home. She has finally landed and making her way here. From Essex. Hm.
In other news, had a fight with Vlad. So I don't think we are talking. This is probably not going to end well. Neither of us has a good history in terms of reconciling with people. It started of as a fairly minor thing but kind of blew out of proportion now. That's all I'm going to say about this for now.
In other news, I found a book that I absolutely relate to. It's called 'The Sleepyhead's Bedside Companion'. I can't believe such book exists. I feel vindicated! I am not the only one obsessed with sleep. There are others like me out there. Every page of this book is either articulating what is already in my head or I want imprinted there. I feel less guilt about my (previously thought unhealthy) preoccupation. I seriously think sleep is underrated in today's society which is obsessed with 'making the most' of each minute. Whatever THAT means. Hrumph.
What else. I finally feel comfortable enough to articulate what I have felt for a long time now. I HATE phones. Landlines, mobile phones, smart phones, blackberries. Whatever. I hate them all. I don't like speaking on the phone. I feel like making phone calls is intrusive - what are the odds you are just sitting there and waiting for the phone to ring? Chances are you are somewhere out and phone ringing causes you to madly scramble through your handbag, finally finding the phone as the last ring dies. You then proceed to try to return the call - getting busy signal because the person is either trying you again or leaving a voicemail. You then call them back again, ignoring the voicemail and they proceed to repeat what they just left on your voicemail (which you will incidentally 'discover' again later and proceed to listen to it...). Or you are having a nap and the phone call may slightly disturb your slumber. Cause unpleasant dreams about work... Or you are talking to another person - with the phone ringing you will be forced to stop, answer the phone, talk to the person on the phone while the other person just sits there (chances are they'll whip out their phone and proceed to call other people). Okay - I'm cutting off my own rant here. I feel like some of the anger I feel may be mis-placed here... Also, I feel like I'm never going to get a phone call from my friends again if they read this. Uhhh. I don't ALWAYS hate it - it's just a general feeling I have about phones. They are evil. These days.
Sunday, 11 April 2010
Weekend. Thank god.
Sunday, 11 April, 2010
Time: 2:33pm, early morning
Location: Kil&Burn
Feeling: disoriented
... Ooops. Had a nap and woke up at 5pm. Sh!T!
Time: 6:30pm
Feeling: Slightly recovered. Still exhausted. Still disoriented. Slightly stressed.
Word of the day: Amorphous: lacking definite form, having no specific shape, formless; of no particular kind or character, indeterminate, having no pattern or structure, unorganised
2YP. I have grown to hate you. And all other ships.
Time: 2:33pm, early morning
Location: Kil&Burn
Feeling: disoriented
... Ooops. Had a nap and woke up at 5pm. Sh!T!
Time: 6:30pm
Feeling: Slightly recovered. Still exhausted. Still disoriented. Slightly stressed.
Word of the day: Amorphous: lacking definite form, having no specific shape, formless; of no particular kind or character, indeterminate, having no pattern or structure, unorganised
2YP. I have grown to hate you. And all other ships.
Wednesday, 7 April 2010
Superheroes
Wed, 7 April, 2010
Location: Home
Feeling: groggy from another 4 hour nap. Bliss :)
Today's class has provoked a serious contemplation of Pokemon's superpowers. What do they actually do?!? It was a key question that I spent much of class researching (iPhone). I was not able to come to a satisfactory conclusion. However, according to my neighbour in class, in a spoof cartoon called 'Drawn Together' (spoof superhero version of The Big Brother the Pokemon character, whenever disappointed, secretes a substance that the other superheroes are addicted to.
Eh right. So I just spent the two hours watching it on YouTube and thus no time to write anymore...
Location: Home
Feeling: groggy from another 4 hour nap. Bliss :)
Today's class has provoked a serious contemplation of Pokemon's superpowers. What do they actually do?!? It was a key question that I spent much of class researching (iPhone). I was not able to come to a satisfactory conclusion. However, according to my neighbour in class, in a spoof cartoon called 'Drawn Together' (spoof superhero version of The Big Brother the Pokemon character, whenever disappointed, secretes a substance that the other superheroes are addicted to.
Eh right. So I just spent the two hours watching it on YouTube and thus no time to write anymore...
Tuesday, 6 April 2010
Life on Mars
Tuesday, 6 April 2010
Location: Home (NW2 4SJ)
Feeling: Sick. Was v tired due to 8:15 am class, but a 4 hour nap fixed that right up. Hm.
Accidentally deleted a paragraph I've written before. Not happy.
So yes - I continue to procrastinate as piles of reading on managing change, work on second year project and pages of unanswered emails await me.
It was a good day today. I got to wear my new winter coat which looks and feels like a tent. I feel cosy in a tent :) Also got to contemplate repercussions of discovery of extraterrestrial life in class. Whenever an MBA class results in such a contemplation, it is a good day.
So, in doubt about the likelihood of extraterrestrial life and needing to unearth the latest in the search for such, I turn to Wiki....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraterrestrial_life
So no aliens for now. Oh well.
Word of the day: (2 today!)
sentience: the ability to feel or perceive subjectively
sapience: wisdom /ability of organism or entity to act with appropriate judgement
Ran into a person in the street today that freaked me out and made me very uncomfortable (eeky) for no apparent reason. It took me a while but eventually I worked it out. It was because his facial features reminded me of Ross. Even mentioning his name produces the same feeling. Morbid curiosity forced me to look him up on facebook. Where he does indeed exist. I was relieved to see that we have no friends in common. *Phew*
I do hope Mischball, with the same morbid sense of curiosity and desire for trouble (which is MUCH stronger than my own) actually goes ahead and adds him. *Shudder*
It's interesting when the desire to clean and organise strikes. I haven't noticed a pattern as yet. I had a sizeable Spring Clean yesterday. I have even started an attempt to computerise my wardrobe... I am distracted by a question which increasingly bothers me... Why is there a ladybug infestation in our apartment??? Seriously?
I mean, it beats cockroaches, but it is still odd, no???
Location: Home (NW2 4SJ)
Feeling: Sick. Was v tired due to 8:15 am class, but a 4 hour nap fixed that right up. Hm.
Accidentally deleted a paragraph I've written before. Not happy.
So yes - I continue to procrastinate as piles of reading on managing change, work on second year project and pages of unanswered emails await me.
It was a good day today. I got to wear my new winter coat which looks and feels like a tent. I feel cosy in a tent :) Also got to contemplate repercussions of discovery of extraterrestrial life in class. Whenever an MBA class results in such a contemplation, it is a good day.
So, in doubt about the likelihood of extraterrestrial life and needing to unearth the latest in the search for such, I turn to Wiki....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraterrestrial_life
So no aliens for now. Oh well.
Word of the day: (2 today!)
sentience: the ability to feel or perceive subjectively
sapience: wisdom /ability of organism or entity to act with appropriate judgement
Ran into a person in the street today that freaked me out and made me very uncomfortable (eeky) for no apparent reason. It took me a while but eventually I worked it out. It was because his facial features reminded me of Ross. Even mentioning his name produces the same feeling. Morbid curiosity forced me to look him up on facebook. Where he does indeed exist. I was relieved to see that we have no friends in common. *Phew*
I do hope Mischball, with the same morbid sense of curiosity and desire for trouble (which is MUCH stronger than my own) actually goes ahead and adds him. *Shudder*
It's interesting when the desire to clean and organise strikes. I haven't noticed a pattern as yet. I had a sizeable Spring Clean yesterday. I have even started an attempt to computerise my wardrobe... I am distracted by a question which increasingly bothers me... Why is there a ladybug infestation in our apartment??? Seriously?
I mean, it beats cockroaches, but it is still odd, no???
Monday, 5 April 2010
Monday, 5 April, 2010
Time: noon-ish
Location: Home at NW2 4SJ
Feeling: sick (literally - blocked nose, eyeballs ready to pop out, headachy and narky). I suppose the last one is not really a symptom. Otherwise I'd be classified as sick all the time. muahaha
What can I say. Birthday (and entry into the 30ies) has brought with it some topics for contemplation.
One of which was, rather unattractively, was snot. As I tried to blow out all my accumulated supplies of nasal mucus before bedtime, I wondered as to the actual composition of this substance (that and also whether anyone has ever drowned overnight in it before). Subsequently, one of the first tasks this morning was to wiki the booger. I know you are all wondering, so here are some highlights:
So, there you go. Never say I'm not educational.
Another topic of contemplation was, rather unsurprisingly and banally, an existential crisis. No more on that one for now.
What else. Hm. It's been mentioned that I need resolutions. I'm trying to come up with a list... My usual ones include:
1) Exercise (agree. but must be not sick to do so...)
2) Be nice to people (except I keep forgetting why...)
3) Try to get out more... (again... sometimes I forget. Plus hard to beat napping...)
Hm. What else?
Time: noon-ish
Location: Home at NW2 4SJ
Feeling: sick (literally - blocked nose, eyeballs ready to pop out, headachy and narky). I suppose the last one is not really a symptom. Otherwise I'd be classified as sick all the time. muahaha
What can I say. Birthday (and entry into the 30ies) has brought with it some topics for contemplation.
One of which was, rather unattractively, was snot. As I tried to blow out all my accumulated supplies of nasal mucus before bedtime, I wondered as to the actual composition of this substance (that and also whether anyone has ever drowned overnight in it before). Subsequently, one of the first tasks this morning was to wiki the booger. I know you are all wondering, so here are some highlights:
Nasal mucus is produced by the nasal mucosa, and mucal tissues lining the airways (trachea, bronchus, bronchioles) is produced by specialized airway epithelial cells (goblet cells) and submucosal glands. Small particles such as dust, particulate pollutants, and allergens as well as infectious agents such as bacteria are caught in the viscous nasal or airway mucus and prevented from entering the system. This event along with the continual movement of the respiratory mucus layer toward the oropharynx, helps prevent foreign objects from entering the lungs during breathing. Additionally, mucus aids in moisturizing the inhaled air and prevents tissues such as the nasal and airway epithelia from drying out. Nasal and airway mucus is produced constitutively, with most of it swallowed unconsciously, even when it is dried.
Increased mucus production in the respiratory tract is a symptom of many common illnesses, such as the common cold and influenza.... The presence of mucus in the nose and throat is normal, but increased quantities can impede comfortable breathing and must be cleared by blowing the nose or expectorating phlegm from the throat. Tears are also a component of nasal mucus
Generally nasal mucus is clear and thin, serving to filter air during inhalation. During times of infection, mucus can change colour to yellow or green either as a result of trapped bacteria,[5] or due to the body's reaction to viral infection.[6]
In the case of bacterial infection, the bacterium becomes trapped in already clogged sinuses, breeding in the moist, nutrient-rich environment.Antibiotics may be used to treat the secondary infection in these cases, but will generally not help with the original cause.
In the case of a viral infection such as cold or flu, the first stage and also the last stage of the infection causes the production of a clear, thin mucus in the nose or back of the throat. As the body begins to react to the virus (generally one to three days), mucus thickens and may turn yellow or green. In viral infections, antibiotics will not be useful, and are a major avenue for misuse. Treatment is generally symptom-based; often it is sufficient to allow the immune system to fight off the virus over time
So, there you go. Never say I'm not educational.
Another topic of contemplation was, rather unsurprisingly and banally, an existential crisis. No more on that one for now.
What else. Hm. It's been mentioned that I need resolutions. I'm trying to come up with a list... My usual ones include:
1) Exercise (agree. but must be not sick to do so...)
2) Be nice to people (except I keep forgetting why...)
3) Try to get out more... (again... sometimes I forget. Plus hard to beat napping...)
Hm. What else?
Wednesday, 17 March 2010
Location: Nash Lounge, LBS, London
Time: 3pmish
Feeling: restless
Why can't I own a Canadian? Valid question.
Last week of term here. Swamped with work. Long to do list. Can't get motivated. Can't concentrate. Eek. Could use a nap. The latter probably doesn't come to anyone as a surprise.
Actually everything is pretty much done except the 2nd year project. Of which there is a lot to do. And tax. God... tax...
And packing for Sth Africa. Hm.
Actually I don't have the presence of mind to write. I give up.
Monday, 1 March 2010
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