27 december, 2007
at home
stressed and worried
At least home life is back to normal. Essay writing is not exactly brilliant - my mentor is not exactly encouraging about the progress of essays. She is a bit like ' well i guess we can have a go and see what happens'. I am leaning more towards not doing anything if i don't have a real chance... This is ruining my holidays. I don't think buzz i having fun either...
Aearegh.
Back to it I suppose. Faarken.
Thursday, 27 December 2007
Tuesday, 25 December 2007
25th December, Christmas Day 2007
Time: nearly midnight
Location: Home (Kensington)
Feeling: a bit flat, somewhat stressed, tired
Just (about 1 hour ago) came back from Buzz's parents Xmas lunch. It started at 3pm. It was a long lunch. Mostly because Buzz and his sister's boyfriend decided to go for a round of golf in the middle. Apparently it's "christmas tradition". I was confused and puzzled. Very. Especially after he just left me there for 1.5 hours. I was not impressed. Still so. We've had a bit of a tiff after I kept being narky (as he was showing no remorse)... *shrug*
Anyway. Not altogether perfect Christmas. Not that it could be with freakin' essays hanging over my head. I have about 11 essays to write I think. Although when you add all the ones that are hidden within application forms, the number would be well into 20s. Also stressing about references... Not sure what is going on with those....
I don't know what I want anymore. I don't know if I can do another year at work if the bus school thing doesn't work out. A bit of a tough gig for another year if you have kind of been planning to be finishing in Aug etc... Maybe I'll see if I can get a job in London or something...
Time: nearly midnight
Location: Home (Kensington)
Feeling: a bit flat, somewhat stressed, tired
Just (about 1 hour ago) came back from Buzz's parents Xmas lunch. It started at 3pm. It was a long lunch. Mostly because Buzz and his sister's boyfriend decided to go for a round of golf in the middle. Apparently it's "christmas tradition". I was confused and puzzled. Very. Especially after he just left me there for 1.5 hours. I was not impressed. Still so. We've had a bit of a tiff after I kept being narky (as he was showing no remorse)... *shrug*
Anyway. Not altogether perfect Christmas. Not that it could be with freakin' essays hanging over my head. I have about 11 essays to write I think. Although when you add all the ones that are hidden within application forms, the number would be well into 20s. Also stressing about references... Not sure what is going on with those....
I don't know what I want anymore. I don't know if I can do another year at work if the bus school thing doesn't work out. A bit of a tough gig for another year if you have kind of been planning to be finishing in Aug etc... Maybe I'll see if I can get a job in London or something...
Saturday, 22 December 2007
22 December 2007
Saturday night - 8pm
Location: Home (Kensington)
Feeling: stressed. I can't remember why I didn't become a hairdresser...
it is a saturday night before xmas. what am i doing? I am writing freaking essays... For business schools. I can't work out if I'm in denial or not about actually getting in. It seems highly remote and unlikely. Should I really be spending my xmas break stressing over this?? I don't know... Farken.
Why am I not a hairdresser again?
Saturday night - 8pm
Location: Home (Kensington)
Feeling: stressed. I can't remember why I didn't become a hairdresser...
it is a saturday night before xmas. what am i doing? I am writing freaking essays... For business schools. I can't work out if I'm in denial or not about actually getting in. It seems highly remote and unlikely. Should I really be spending my xmas break stressing over this?? I don't know... Farken.
Why am I not a hairdresser again?
Friday, 7 December 2007
Monday, 12 November 2007
I am not unfriendly... It's cultural
Sunday, 11 November 2007
Still in Melbourne
Date: 12 November, 2007
Time: 9am, Monday morning
Location: work (101 collins)
Feeling: like it's monday morning, ingesting coffee
Well... I'm still in Melbourne. Apparently I'm going to Thailand "probably next Monday". Hmmm. I have heard that before... Have been in Melbourne for a few weeks now. Non-billable. Getting a bit worried about that. Can't be a good thing.
Still cleaning Buzz's house. It's amazing. I am sick of cleaning. I just want it to be magically done. Time for a cleaner I think...
Other than that, the new place is actually quite nice. Walls are very thin though and I keep thinking someone is walking around the house when it is really next door. It's also a bit interesting how it suddenly feels like being in a married couple. One day we're seeing each other every other week and now suddenly we are shopping for appliances and I'm ironing his shirts... It's still hasn't quite computed in my head. I guess the status quo will be restored when I go to Thailand so maybe I won't have to think too hard about it all...
Time: 9am, Monday morning
Location: work (101 collins)
Feeling: like it's monday morning, ingesting coffee
Well... I'm still in Melbourne. Apparently I'm going to Thailand "probably next Monday". Hmmm. I have heard that before... Have been in Melbourne for a few weeks now. Non-billable. Getting a bit worried about that. Can't be a good thing.
Still cleaning Buzz's house. It's amazing. I am sick of cleaning. I just want it to be magically done. Time for a cleaner I think...
Other than that, the new place is actually quite nice. Walls are very thin though and I keep thinking someone is walking around the house when it is really next door. It's also a bit interesting how it suddenly feels like being in a married couple. One day we're seeing each other every other week and now suddenly we are shopping for appliances and I'm ironing his shirts... It's still hasn't quite computed in my head. I guess the status quo will be restored when I go to Thailand so maybe I won't have to think too hard about it all...
Monday, 22 October 2007
Location: office, 101 collins
Time: after lunch, Monday, 22 October, 2007
Feeling: sleepy, un-motivated, a bit bored
It's very strange, working in the office... I can't make up my mind about it. I think I like it for now. I have a feeling I may get a bit bored in the near future.
Have spent the whole Sunday cleaning and moving. I couldn't believe how much dirt and filth and rubbish could be in one small kitchen. 2 people working together for 6 hours (pretty intensely) only managed to just finish the kitchen. 6 full rubbish bags, 3 boxes of rubbish and 2 boxes of glass jars later. Now just 1 living room, 1 bathroom and 3 bedrooms to go. and the bits in between.
Time: after lunch, Monday, 22 October, 2007
Feeling: sleepy, un-motivated, a bit bored
It's very strange, working in the office... I can't make up my mind about it. I think I like it for now. I have a feeling I may get a bit bored in the near future.
Have spent the whole Sunday cleaning and moving. I couldn't believe how much dirt and filth and rubbish could be in one small kitchen. 2 people working together for 6 hours (pretty intensely) only managed to just finish the kitchen. 6 full rubbish bags, 3 boxes of rubbish and 2 boxes of glass jars later. Now just 1 living room, 1 bathroom and 3 bedrooms to go. and the bits in between.
Friday, 19 October 2007
Location: office, 101 collins
time: after lunch, 3pm, Friday, 19 October
Feeling: tired, uninspired, sleepy, vomitous
Why won't this week (work week) just finish... it keeps going on and on... i'm ready for a serious nap. I'm ready for a weekend of sloth. I'll even pass on lust and gluttony. Pride and wrath take too much effort. So does vanity. I forget what else is there. Clearly it could not be a fun one. Sloth rocks.
Meanwhile only 3 minutes have passed since I started writing this. Far out. Time is literally crawling. I want to crawl too - into bed.
Ate waaaay too much - we went to yam cha with the office. One of my development needs is, since I'm the longest tenured person in the office (aside from one other), to create "culture". Whatever that is. And to do it long distance from Bangkok. Hmmm!
Well we all need our challenges and hobbies... It's not like I have anything else on my plate in terms of social engagements in melbourne...
5 minutes. Far out.
time: after lunch, 3pm, Friday, 19 October
Feeling: tired, uninspired, sleepy, vomitous
Why won't this week (work week) just finish... it keeps going on and on... i'm ready for a serious nap. I'm ready for a weekend of sloth. I'll even pass on lust and gluttony. Pride and wrath take too much effort. So does vanity. I forget what else is there. Clearly it could not be a fun one. Sloth rocks.
Meanwhile only 3 minutes have passed since I started writing this. Far out. Time is literally crawling. I want to crawl too - into bed.
Ate waaaay too much - we went to yam cha with the office. One of my development needs is, since I'm the longest tenured person in the office (aside from one other), to create "culture". Whatever that is. And to do it long distance from Bangkok. Hmmm!
Well we all need our challenges and hobbies... It's not like I have anything else on my plate in terms of social engagements in melbourne...
5 minutes. Far out.
Monday, 15 October 2007
another week in Melbourne
Location: Office, 101 Collins
Time: 9:52am, Monday morning, 15 October, 2007
Feeling: still peeved at firm (not feeling the cheer), other than that - too early to tell...
The weekend involved - 2 dinners, 1 lunch, 1 movie, 1 physiotherapist, 3 naps
crap gotta do work...
Time: 9:52am, Monday morning, 15 October, 2007
Feeling: still peeved at firm (not feeling the cheer), other than that - too early to tell...
The weekend involved - 2 dinners, 1 lunch, 1 movie, 1 physiotherapist, 3 naps
crap gotta do work...
Friday, 12 October 2007
another day
Location: office, 101 collins
Time: 12ish
Feeling: kind of depressed, shitty
Another day at work. How is that I can like people at the firm, and yet not like the firm (as a collective). I find that strange. I guess I don't like everyone. But the people I like outweigh those I don't. So it's always been a puzzle for me, how it is that those few can have such an impact as part of the overall firm. Unless it's the structure of the firm that facilitates that sort of crappiness. Anyway, I don't know what's going on. I think I'm just going to shut up and do the work, since I don't really understand what they want from me.
Still broke. Maaan. It's like another 3 weeks until payday. Sigh.
I want to go back to bed. I was not ready to leave the safety and security of my bed this morning. Not a happy bunny. Stoopid job.
PS I am also not ENTP. My actual test (official one I did for work) said INTP.
Time: 12ish
Feeling: kind of depressed, shitty
Another day at work. How is that I can like people at the firm, and yet not like the firm (as a collective). I find that strange. I guess I don't like everyone. But the people I like outweigh those I don't. So it's always been a puzzle for me, how it is that those few can have such an impact as part of the overall firm. Unless it's the structure of the firm that facilitates that sort of crappiness. Anyway, I don't know what's going on. I think I'm just going to shut up and do the work, since I don't really understand what they want from me.
Still broke. Maaan. It's like another 3 weeks until payday. Sigh.
I want to go back to bed. I was not ready to leave the safety and security of my bed this morning. Not a happy bunny. Stoopid job.
PS I am also not ENTP. My actual test (official one I did for work) said INTP.
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